You Have Entered WestWingChat
by Lyria Padfoot
Summary: West Wing crew meets up... on AIM! All the favorites are here and interacting...
1. Instant Messaging

A/N: My first attempt at a West Wing fanfiction... this one was done for me to practice characterization and interaction before I attempted a real full-length story.  Oh, yes, and neither West Wing nor AIM belong to me.

OH!  And I am one of those who thinks that Simon being killed was EVIL, POINTLESS, AND DUMB, so we're going to assume he's alive and that episode simply didn't happen.

Instant Message from CynicalOne916 to AgentSunshine

CynicalOne916:  Could your screen name be any less creative?

AgentSunshine: You realize your stalker can read your input, which includes your instant messages?

CynicalOne916: I borrowed Leo's computer.

AgentSunshine: So you're still at work... did you tell him?

CynicalOne916: I e-mailed him to let him know.

AgentSunshine: He can't check his e-mail if you're using his computer.

CynicalOne916: Yeah.

AgentSunshine: So he doesn't know you 'borrowed' his computer.

CynicalOne916: Would you leave me alone? You bother me all day... go think of a better screen name or something.

AgentSunshine: FlamingoGuard?

CynicalOne916: I still object to that codename.

AgentSunshine: You make that clear every time I use it.

CynicalOne916: So why do you use it?

AgentSunshine: Because it's your codename.

CynicalOne916: Can I have a new one?

AgentSunshine: No.

Instant Message from SimplyCanadian to LemonLyman

SimplyCanadian: CJ hasn't seen that screen name yet, has she?

LemonLyman: And she's not going to.

SimplyCanadian: What possessed you to use it as your screen name?

LemonLyman: Lack of creativity.

SimplyCanadian: I don't know; the moose meat from Finland was a really creative gift.

LemonLyman: Just trying to make you feel special.

SimplyCandian: Oh, thanks.

LemonLyman: Anytime.

SimplyCanadian: ... How upset would you be if I told CJ this screen name?

LemonLyman: DONNA!

SimplyCanadian: O:-)

Instant Message from Yankees441 to PrincetonGrad627

Yankees441: Why aren't you working?

PrincetonGrad627: Why aren't *you* working?

Yankees441: That's not the question at hand.

PrincetonGrad627: That's not the question?  You asked me the same thing!

Yankees441: Yes, and I asked you first.

PrincetonGrad627: Did you just throw your ball at the wall?  I heard a thunk.

Yankees441: Sure it wasn't you tripping over something again?

PrincetonGrad627: I'm sitting.

Yankees441: So?

PrincetonGrad627: Toby, I'd just like to thank you for your constant encouragement.  It means a lot to me.

Yankees441: That's just the kind of guy I am.  Now get back to work.

Instant Message from POTUS41 to double07

POTUS41: Wimp-ass movies.

double07: Yes, Mr. President.

POTUS41: He gets all arrogant over his weak martini...

double07: Yes sir... Zoey and I are going out next Friday.

POTUS41: I'll try to get my dungeon built before then.

double07: Good luck... I think.

POTUS41: Should I be concerned that the entire senior staff is on AIM at work?

double07: Probably, sir.

POTUS41: Right.  Remind me to have Leo yell at them... do you think they'd mind opening a chat?

double07: I'll start it, sir.


	2. On To the Chat

A/N: The same applies... and VERY SORRY about my formatting troubles.  Bad, bad me.  It should be better now.

Part 3 is coming, and it is a REALLY REALLY long section of CJ & Simon banter I cowrote with another friend… so read this in the meantime and know that it's coming!

You have entered WhiteHouseChat.

double07 has entered the room.

POTUS43 has entered the room.

SimplyCanadian has entered the room.

PrincetonGrad627 has entered the room.

Yankees441 has entered the room.

CynicalOne916 has entered the room.

LemonLyman has entered the room.

AgentSunshine has entered the room.

LemonLyman: Hey, where's Leo?

AgentSunshine: I bet Ms. Cregg could tell us.

CynicalOne916: Would you go away?  Josh, may I just say: So far up your ass!!

LemonLyman::hides::

AgentSunshine has left the room.

AlwaysThere has entered the room.

CynicalOne916: I'm supposed to find that funny, aren't I?

PrincetonGrad627: The rest of us do.

Yankees441: *I* don't.

POTUS43: You don't find anything funny, Toby.

Yankees441: Right.  Hello, sir.

PrincetonGrad627: Nice screen name, Mr. President.

CynicalOne916 has left the room.

POTUS43: Thank you, Sam.  I was told I should be worried that you're all on AIM at work.

SimplyCanadian: But that's not true, sir; Leo isn't on.

AlwaysThere::clears throat::

VietVetLTM has entered the room.

SimplyCanadian: Nevermind.

AlwaysThere has left the room.

AgentSunshine has entered the room.

Yankees441: Can you stop with the magical screen names?

AgentSunshine: I switched computers.  Ms. Cregg went silent, which was a cause for concern, but then I realized the Chief of Staff was on which meant she had to find a new person to pilfer a laptop from, so I took the opportunity to switch names for the sake of easy identification.

VietVetLTM: I appreciate that, by the way.  

AgentSunshine: Anytime.

VietVetLTM: CJ found another computer, so she'll be back in a minute.

CynicalOne916 has entered the room.

LemonLyman: That was just a little bit scary.  We're talking about her, and there she is.

CynicalOne916: Please tell me it's because I'm driving Agent Spark Plug over there crazy.

AgentSunshine: That's Special Agent Spark Plug, not that it matters.  And also the battery, and...

CynicalOne916: Fine: Special Agent Car Engine Thief.  How's that?

SimplyCanadian: You two fight like a married couple.

CynicalOne916: Never.  Ever.  Say.  That.  Again.

Yankees441: Personally, I think he has a lot more patience than I used to think it was humanly possible to have.

AgentSunshine: Well, thank you sir.

PrincetonGrad627: Maybe he got the patience was supposed to be yours, Toby.

Yankees441: You're supposed to be writing!

PrincetonGrad627: So are you.

double07: Hey, he might be writing; I called him on that once and he recited half a speech he had in his head and told me paper's for wimps.

VietVetLTM: Stop it everyone, you're scaring the President.

POTUS41: Actually, I'm at a website that Donna sent me.  LemonLyman.Com, Josh?

LemonLyman: CJ threatened to shove a motherboard up my ass if she found out I'd been there again, sir.

CynicalOne916: "Mr. President, Mr. President, CJ's being mean to me!"

POTUS43: CJ, be nice to Josh.  You can pick on Toby.

CynicalOne916: Yes, sir.

Yankees441: I'd just like to thank you for that, Mr. President.

POTUS43: Anytime, Toby.  Leo, should we be doing something?

VietVetLTM: Actually, not that I know of.  

PrincetonGrad627: Someone should mark the calendar.

double07: Definitely.

Yankees441: Well, Sam has something to do, but he's not...

PrincetonGrad627: You aren't writing either!!!

VietVetLTM: Toby acts as a sort of muse, Sam.  He sits there and tries to inspire you to write while setting a bad example by not doing the same.

Yankees441: Damn right.

CynicalOne916: He's especially good at the bad example part.

Yankees441: Go wash your windshield.  Whoops, you can't, because your agent is about five times smarter than you!

CynicalOne916: Which means he's got to be at least ten times as smart as you.

PrincetonGrad627: Nice work, CJ.

AgentSunshine: Agreed.

CynicalOne916: Thank you.

POTUS43: And these are the people I willingly surround myself with daily.

double07: We lost Josh and Donna.

SimplyCanadian: Oh, we were IMing.

LemonLyman: Yeah.

CynicalOne916: Thank you.

LemonLyman: Uh... what for?

CynicalOne916: For cybering out of the chat... after all, you have to get your kicks online while at work.

SimplyCanadian: :o

LemonLyman: :o

Yankees441: Way to demonstrate her point.

SimplyCanadian: Just how special is your agent there, CJ?

CynicalOne916: Congratulations, Donna; you just made my shit list.

AgentSunshine: That would be pretty inappropriate.  I'm protecting her; that would be a distraction.

LemonLyman: Whoa, we're discussing protection now?

AgentSunshine: The fact that she threatened to shove a motherboard up your ass isn't enough for you?

SimplyCanadian: But you nearly admitted you find her distracting; is it because of her intelligence or her beauty or her wit?

VietVetLTM: Josh, Donna, stop heckling the Secret Service, would you?

CynicalOne916: Leo, I could kiss you right now.

LemonLyman: What would Special Agent Donovan think of that?

AgentSunshine: That if you aren't very, very careful she's going to shove that motherboard so far up your ass it'll come out your nose.

CynicalOne916: Toby if you don't shut up I'm shoving it up yours.

Yankees441: I didn't say anything!

POTUS43: She could tell you were thinking it.

CynicalOne916: Thank you, Mr. President.

POTUS43: Anytime, CJ.

Yankees441 has left the room.

PrincetonGrad627: We weren't that mean.

LemonLyman: He'll be back.

(There is an extended pause.)

SimplyCanadian: He's not back.

VietVetLTM: No, Donna, he's not.

CynicalOne916: Hey Agent Spark Plug, go find him.

PrincetonGrad627: *Special* Agent Spark Plug.

CynicalOne916: Don't you start.

AgentSunshine: I'm responsible for you, Ms. Cregg, and that's more than enough.

double07: brb

LemonLyman: What's he doing?

POTUS43: Went to find Toby.

(An even longer pause.)

double07: back... no one knows where he went.  He sort of vanished.

POTUS43: Oh where oh where has my speechwriter gone, oh where oh where could he be?

double07: Sir, please don't do that again.  It really scares me.

CynicalOne916: Mr. President... it's Vicodin *or* Percocet, not both...

POTUS43: Just remember, you two, special assignment in the Yukon.

Yankees441 has entered the room.

SimplyCanadian: Where did you go??

Yankees441: To the bathroom.

VietVetLTM: And no one thought to check the bathrooms?  Charlie?

Yankees441: Wait... you searched for me?!?

POTUS43: Not that we'd have missed you, but yes, we did.

Yankees441: Excuse me everyone, I need to go laugh at you all now.

VietVetLTM: Hate to break up the party, but we actually have work to do now.  I need to meet everyone in my office.

VietVetLTM has left the room.

Yankees441 has left the room.

LemonLyman has left the room.

SimplyCanadian has left the room.

CynicalOne916 has left the room.

AgentSunshine has left the room.

POTUS43 has left the room.

PrincetonGrad627 has left the room.

double07 has left the room.


	3. CJ and Simon Banter

A/N: Again, West Wing & AIM don't belong to me... I own only whatever passes for a plot.

The background you need for this part: In between parts 2 and 3, CJ's stalker is caught.  If Aaron Sorkin can do this without any background, then so can I.  If you'd like background, let me know and I could possibly put it in when I get characterization down and start a real story.

This part was cowritten with LisaMarie, another West Wing fan.  I did the CJ lines, she did the Simon lines, I put it together and boom!  It was a fanfic!

Please please please READ AND REVIEW!

Instant Message from AgentSparkPlug to CynicalOne916

AgentSparkPlug: I put your car back together.

CynicalOne916: Thank you.

AgentSparkPlug: I took it apart; I thought I should probably put it together.

CynicalOne916: You can fire a gun and fix a car.  What more could a girl want?

AgentSparkPlug: I could show you a few things.  This evening, if you like.

CynicalOne916: I'm sure you could, but that would be inappropriate.

AgentSparkPlug: Yesterday it would have been.  Today it isn't.  

CynicalOne916: Right.

AgentSparkPlug: I'd even bring you a present.

CynicalOne916: The last present I got from a man was a goldfish.

AgentSparkPlug: I'd bring flowers.

CynicalOne916: For the goldfish?

AgentSparkPlug: Her too.

CynicalOne916: There's just one problem.

AgentSparkPlug: Gail doesn't like flowers?

CynicalOne916: You leave Gail alone.  In order to date you need, you know, time off.  

AgentSparkPlug: Right.

CynicalOne916: Well... you could come over and I could cook.

AgentSparkPlug: You cook?

CynicalOne916: I do, actually.

AgentSparkPlug: Like what?  Macaroni and Cheese?

CynicalOne916: Believe it or not, Simon, there is food that doesn't come out of boxes!!

AgentSparkPlug: Really?  Since when?

CynicalOne916: You are such a stereotypical guy.

AgentSparkPlug: Is that an insult or a compliment?  I can't really tell.

CynicalOne916: I'm not sure myself.

AgentSparkPlug: Then I'll take it as a compliment.  Hey!  That's the first time you've ever said anything nice to me!

CynicalOne916: No; I told you I like that you're tall.

AgentSparkPlug: Yeah but that's not based on something I did on purpose.  I'm tall by nature, a man through work.

CynicalOne916: Now would that be surgical work, or should I just not ask?

AgentSparkPlug: I set myself up for that.

CynicalOne916: Yes, you did.  Thanks for the help.

AgentSparkPlug: Like you needed more reasons to pick on me.

CynicalOne916: I mock because I care.  In a strange sort of way.

AgentSparkPlug:  You care do you?  :-*  Hey!  Would you look at that?  I never noticed that one before.

CynicalOne916: I care in a very strange sort of You-Caught-The-Person-Trying-To-Kill-Me way.

AgentSparkPlug:  So does that mean You-Caught-The-Person-Trying-To-Kill-Me-so-I want-to-repay-you-by-letting-you-take-me-out-and-buy-flowers-for-my-goldfish sort of way?

CynicalOne916: I suppose.  But if you ever call me ma'am again you will meet the fate of Josh.

AgentSparkPlug:  What should I call you then?

CynicalOne916: Well, let's see... I believe it's the custom when two people go out that they call each other by first name.  You know, I call you Simon and you call me CJ.

AgentSparkPlug:  I just realized you said I could take you out.

CynicalOne916: And they trust you with a gun?

AgentSparkPlug:  I'm good with my equipment.

CynicalOne916: Yes, I know.  They gave you lessons.

AgentSparkPlug:  So am I taking you out or are you cooking for me?

CynicalOne916: You're taking me out.  After that comment up there, you are not coming to my house.

AgentSparkPlug:  Then how can I give Gail her pretty flowers?

CynicalOne916: Gail lives in my office.  Which, by the way, is a good place for you to meet me.

AgentSparkPlug:  I've been in your office a hundred times.  But I can show you my equipment there as well as I could at your house.  I can even come show you now if you want.

CynicalOne916: And I could beat you with my filing cabinet.

AgentSparkPlug:  Normally I'd say you can't lift a filing cabinet so it doesn't matter... but I don't know about you.

CynicalOne916: And you don't want to find out the hard way. O:-)

AgentSparkPlug:   I like this screen name.  I think it's appropriate.

CynicalOne916: Act your age, not your shoe size.

AgentSparkPlug:  Look at how many connotations it has, though.

CynicalOne916: Amazing.  And I still think you need to act your age and not your shoe size.

AgentSparkPlug:  I do act my age.  I'm just also in touch with my inner child.

CynicalOne916: No, see, that's not your inner child.  That's your inner pervert.

AgentSparkPlug:  You said earlier I was a stereotypical male.  That inner pervert and I get along well.

CynicalOne916: Alright, you have got a point.  You don't have any numbers after either of your screen names.

AgentSparkPlug:  Yeah what's with that 916?  I know you're not *that* old.

CynicalOne916: Keep it up and there's not going to be a second date.  That's my birthday.  Make note, and don't forget it.

AgentSparkPlug:  So that would be...September sixteenth then.  Right?

CynicalOne916: Astounded.  The Secret Service really hires the cream of the crop.

AgentSparkPlug:  Yes ma'am.  I certainly am top notch.

CynicalOne916: And there's that ma'am again.

AgentSparkPlug:  Sorry.  I'm just kind of scared to call you C.J.

CynicalOne916: See?  Look, you did it.  And it's shorter to type, too.

AgentSparkPlug:  That it is.  C.J.  C.J. C.J.  Well what do you know.

CynicalOne916: I'm impressed.

AgentSparkPlug:  Now will you let me come to your home and impress you more?

CynicalOne916: I haven't decided yet.

AgentSparkPlug:  But you didn't say it was a definite no.  See I've already improved in your eyes.

CynicalOne916: Well the fact that you aren't required to follow me around anymore helps.

AgentSparkPlug:  It gave me a good excuse though.

CynicalOne916: I think Spark Plug should be your new codename.

AgentSparkPlug:  I've got a spark plug I could show you.

CynicalOne916: See, just when I start to think maybe you're a gentleman, you say something like that and I start to worry again.

AgentSparkPlug:  Gentleman think those things, they just aren't honest about them like I am.

CynicalOne916: Well be honest in a more tactful manner.

AgentSparkPlug:  Fine, CJ, I would love to show you how well I utilize my "equipment."

CynicalOne916: How about you show Gail and I take the flowers?

AgentSparkPlug: I think you'd appreciate what I can give more than Gail could.

CynicalOne916: Gail is an appreciative fish. 

AgentSparkPlug:  Do I have to ask how you know that?

CynicalOne916: I wouldn't.

AgentSparkPlug:  So now I have to.  How do you know that your fish is appreciative of equipment?

CynicalOne916: She's my fish.  I know these things.

AgentSparkPlug:  You've let your fish play with equipment before?  I know you can't mean a plastic substitute; that could electrocute her.

CynicalOne916: I simply have intuition.

CynicalOne916: I just know.

AgentSparkPlug:  You have intution?  You just look at your goldfish and think...yes she would appreciate some good..."equipment"?

CynicalOne916: Age, not shoe size.

AgentSparkPlug:  Speaking of shoe size...

CynicalOne916: Go Away.  Now.

AgentSparkPlug:  Don't say that.

CynicalOne916: Why not?

AgentSparkPlug:  It's mean.

CynicalOne916: Look at my screen name.  I am not a nice woman, Simon.

AgentSparkPlug:  Yes you are.  You just don't know it yet, ma'am.  Er...C.J.

CynicalOne916: But you somehow picked it up?

AgentSparkPlug: Of course.

CynicalOne916: Because you're so intuitive that before you didn't realize that I agreed to let you take me out.

AgentSparkPlug: I can read people.  Not... statements.

CynicalOne916: I'm impressed simply by the fact that you can read.

AgentSparkPlug: Hey now.  You hurt me.

CynicalOne916: And a few days ago you made fun of me because I borrowed my boss's computer so as to elude stalkers.

AgentSparkPlug:  I just like to make fun of you.

CynicalOne916: And I mock because I care.

AgentSparkPlug:  So you do care.  Well now that's sweet.

CynicalOne916: You saved my life.  I'm required to care.

AgentSparkPlug:  You care more about me than just that.  So are you going to tell me where to take you or do I have to guess?

CynicalOne916: Surprise me.

AgentSparkPlug: Is there a certain type of food you absolutely despise?

CynicalOne916: Not that I can think of.

AgentSparkPlug: What's your favorite?

CynicalOne916: I don't have a favorite... do *you* have a favorite?

AgentSparkPlug: I thought all good food came in boxes remember?

CynicalOne916: Well then I'm guessing you like Chinese.

AgentSparkPlug:  Hey!  That was really funny.  Actually I don't really like Chinese that much.

CynicalOne916: You worry me.

AgentSparkPlug:  Why?

CynicalOne916: ... Nevermind.  I'm sure you'll get it.

AgentSparkPlug:  You have faith in me.  How sweet.

CynicalOne916: I have to have faith in you.  You saved my life.  

AgentSparkPlug:  I'd do it again to, even if you weren't as grateful.

CynicalOne916: See, that was sweet.  You should say things like that more often.

AgentSparkPlug:  Right, so I have to work on being sweet and being more...tactful when discussing my sexual urges.

CynicalOne916: Yes.  At least for a while.  Like, you know, until we've had a few official dates.

AgentSparkPlug:  So how many dates 'til I can come home with you at the end of the night?  Just so I have an estimate?  Two?  Three?  One?

CynicalOne916: You'll know.

AgentSparkPlug:  So when do I get to start..."courting" you ma'am...um...C.J.?

CynicalOne916: Well, when are you free?

AgentSparkPlug:  If I say then you'll use it to make fun of me.

CynicalOne916: Me too.

AgentSparkPlug:  So tonight's good for you too then?  How about seven?

CynicalOne916: Sounds good.

AgentSparkPlug:  Alright great.  You know what's great about this whole talking on a computer thing?  You can't laugh at me for my expression right now.

CynicalOne916: I know, it really helps.

CynicalOne916: Leo's coming; I have to look busy; see you at seven!

AgentSparkPlug: Right, seven.

Auto Response from CynicalOne916: Leo's coming; have to look busy.  Toby and Sam, you'd better do the same before he drops in on you.


	4. More CJ and Simon Banter

A/N: The day after the date… Of course, try as they may to be discreet, we know that everyone will know all about CJ and Simon by the end of the day… Again, nothing belongs to me.

Oh, and I'm looking for a new better screen name for CJ… if you have an idea, leave it in the review I'm sure you're going to leave for me to brighten my day and make Toby the Muse cooperate.

CynicalOne916: Good morning.

AgentSparkPlug: Didn't you say that already when you woke up in my arms?  
CynicalOne916: Right but I'm saying it again.   
AgentSparkPlug: Well then good morning. Did you sleep well?  
CynicalOne916: Very well... you?  
AgentSparkPlug: Honestly? Much better than I have in a long time.  
CynicalOne916: That was actually a little bit scary... I was thinking that.  
AgentSparkPlug: Were you? See, I can read your mind. Probably why I was able to... nevermind.  
CynicalOne916: Right, better not discuss that where there are people around.  
AgentSparkPlug: Then again, it'd make me look really good.  
CynicalOne916: Right, and I could definitely look worse. But people around here *really* like to tease me.  
AgentSparkPlug: Hmm… I wonder why?  
AgentSparkPlug: That was a sarcastic remark by the way.  
CynicalOne916: I was hoping it was.  
AgentSparkPlug: Why are you so cynical anyway? You can be a really nice person.  
CynicalOne916: Well, according to Josh it's a defense mechanism. I think it's because I spend too much time around Toby and the stupid press.  
AgentSparkPlug: I really enjoyed your company last night C.J.  
CynicalOne916: Wow. You did that scary mind reading thing again.  
AgentSparkPlug: Can I try it again?  
CynicalOne916: You're two for two, go for it.  
AgentSparkPlug: I think you're thinking about a certain point in time last night when I...wait, we said we can't talk about that.  
CynicalOne916: I think we should avoid it, because Sam just walked into my office.  
AgentSparkPlug: HEY GUESS WHAT I DID?  
AgentSparkPlug: But you were thinking about it weren't you?  
CynicalOne916: Yes, and I would simply like to say that I have absolutely no problems blocking you.  
AgentSparkPlug: Blocking? I always wondered what that button was. What's it do?  
CynicalOne916: Makes it so I can't talk to you and you can't talk to me.  
AgentSparkPlug: But why would you want to do that?  
CynicalOne916: To prevent you from acting your shoe size again.  
AgentSparkPlug: Sorry. I'll go back to being sweet and gentlemanly. So when do I get to take you out again? Or can I get you to cook for me?  
CynicalOne916: Thank you. Would you like me to cook?  
AgentSparkPlug: I would *love* for you to cook for me C.J. You have no idea.  
(Slight Pause)  
CynicalOne916: Sorry, Sam made a comment and I had to threaten him.  
CynicalOne916: Then I'll cook.  
AgentSparkPlug: What'd he say?  
CynicalOne916: Said I should warn you that you were taking your life into your hands letting me cook for you... not that he'd know.  
AgentSparkPlug: Well tell him that he's taking his life into his hands insulting you where I can hear him.  
CynicalOne916: See, this is why I'm cynical. People are nice to me and I immediately get suspicious.  
CynicalOne916: I'm sitting here thinking to myself "what does he want?"   
AgentSparkPlug: If you're the only one in your office I can tell you part of it.  
CynicalOne916: I can figure it out on my own, but thanks for the offer to clear things up.  
AgentSparkPlug: You're welcome. Wow, if you could see my smile right now...  
(Another Pause) 

CynicalOne916: That time I had to go intimidate Josh for referring to you as "Special Agent Loverboy"  
CynicalOne916: I like your smile. I like it a lot.  
AgentSparkPlug: I like yours too.  
CynicalOne916: I sent Josh running to his office and the relative safety of Donna. I wonder how long it'll take the two of them to figure it out.  
AgentSparkPlug: Well we figured it out pretty quickly but then, she's Canadian.  
CynicalOne916: And Josh is... well, Josh.  
AgentSparkPlug: He's not a stud like me.  
CynicalOne916: He has a tendency to say things at the wrong time. And he doesn't catch on when it comes to women.  
AgentSparkPlug: I do though.  
CynicalOne916: Yes, you do. I have to commend you on that.  
AgentSparkPlug: When do I get to see you again?  
CynicalOne916: Right, you aren't always *right* there anymore... well, my social life consists of you, so if you want me to cook tonight, I think that could be arranged.  
AgentSparkPlug: I'll check my calendar.  
AgentSparkPlug: Okay I lied; I have no plans. Tonight is great.  
CynicalOne916: It's okay, it was just a little fib.  
AgentSparkPlug: I was trying to sound...like I have a life. And I don't.  
CynicalOne916: Well... we know we'll always have time for each other.  
CynicalOne916: Wait a minute; that was optimistic! Simon, what have you done to me???  
AgentSparkPlug: Many things. But not half as much as I can do to you.  
CynicalOne916: That was not what I meant, which I am *certain* you know, but I believe you will find the same applies in reverse. The inner pervert returns.  
AgentSparkPlug: Yeah it does but this time you know I can follow through. But wait...you're saying you could do more to me than you did last night?  
CynicalOne916: Shh. Toby Alert.  
AgentSparkPlug: Okay, quiet. I don't want to give him ideas. He may try and take you away.  
CynicalOne916: See, there was that sweet Simon emerging from somewhere again.  
AgentSparkPlug: He would. I swear Toby Ziegler wants you. Not that I blame him.  
CynicalOne916: Well, I'd rather he want me than you. Then there'd be cause for concern.  
AgentSparkPlug: Yeah that would distrub me...but then, you never know.  
CynicalOne916: Toby's actually a pretty normal pain in the ass. Not that that made any sense.  
AgentSparkPlug: Right C.J. Whatever you say.  
CynicalOne916: Well I know what I mean, anyway.  
AgentSparkPlug: So what're you making tonight?  
CynicalOne916: I don't know yet, any requests?  
AgentSparkPlug: Something homemade.  
CynicalOne916: Wow. At least I know you aren't picky.  
AgentSparkPlug: What is your specialty?  
CynicalOne916: Nothing specific. I just... cook. How's your day so far?  
AgentSparkPlug: Well I woke up this morning completely content and laying with an amazing woman. It's gone downhill from there but only because nothing could top that.  
CynicalOne916: Yeah... I shouldn't have gotten out of bed. It's been a waste of makeup from there.  
AgentSparkPlug: I almost wished you hadn't. We should have stayed there together. But I think you look just as beautiful without make up.  
CynicalOne916: Right, so we've established that Sunday morning when we don't have to work, we are not getting out of bed.  
AgentSparkPlug: You just did that mind reading thing.  
CynicalOne916: Scary, isn't it?   
AgentSparkPlug: In a way yes, in another no.  
CynicalOne916: Care to elaborate?  
AgentSparkPlug: Well it scares me that you're in my head but nice that we're that... in sync.  
CynicalOne916: See, there it is again.  
AgentSparkPlug: Reading your mind?  
CynicalOne916: Yes.  
CynicalOne916: It's kind of... nice. In a strange way.  
AgentSparkPlug: I agree. Know what I'm thinking now?  
CynicalOne916: I bet it has something to do with me.  
AgentSparkPlug: Yeah it does. And my inner pervert.  
CynicalOne916: I thought so.  
AgentSparkPlug: God this is going to be a long day. Can I come talk to you?  
CynicalOne916: I have to go talk to the press... you could claim safety measures and join me and then we can talk afterward.  
AgentSparkPlug: Good plan, see you in a bit. C.J. Before I see you. I just want you to know that I don't regret one second of last night. And I wish I'd had the guts to be a gentleman sooner.  
CynicalOne916: We had other complications to deal with first.  
AgentSparkPlug: I know. But I plan on minimizing complications from now on.  
CynicalOne916: We wouldn't have met if it wasn't for them. I think that's why I got death threats in the first place.  
AgentSparkPlug: That's sweet, in a scary morbid sort of way.  
CynicalOne916: Agreed.  
AgentSparkPlug: So do you think I live up to my screen name?  
CynicalOne916: I think that's a personal question and I'll let you know when we get out of the press room.  
AgentSparkPlug: And there's that huge smile of mine again.  
CynicalOne916: I'd imagine.  
AgentSparkPlug: So I'll meet you when?  
CynicalOne916: Now. My office.  
AgentSparkPlug: I'm there.


End file.
